Marriage stuck in a rut? How to rekindle that spark.

Love is one of the most poetic intrapersonal emotions we can experience in our lives. When we share such a precious feeling with another person who feels the same way, it can be profound, complex, and simply spellbinding. In the best cases, couples take the next step to sanctify their love by getting married. Typically, following this honeymoon stage, it seems as if nothing could separate you from your soulmate and that your love could withstand the test of time.
And then the dream fades.

Contrary to popular belief, love is not always easy. It takes hard work, trust, accountability, patience, teamwork, and a lot of communication. Is your marriage on the rocks? Review the following inquiry to discover how you and your partner can rekindle your spark.

We feel more like roommates or stalemates. How do we turn this around?

Time, our careers, past betrayal, and dishonesty can all take their toll on a marriage. But for better or worse, you have made a pact to remain committed to one another in sickness and in health, until death do you part. The key to rekindling your marriage is to spice up your sex life, carve out time to specifically spend together, and exercise spontaneity.

Spice it up
A good sex life is essential for a healthy marriage. When there’s no physical touch, chemistry, or passion, it’s no wonder feelings begin to fade! It’s important to change your pattern of initiating sex. If one person is naturally the aggressor, be submissive from time to time and give up control to your partner. Affirm them during by murmuring sweet nothings or talking dirty to them if that’s what they’re into. Eliminate any sexual routines between the two of you that you have come to expect over the years and redefine your sex life by daring to be bold. Be different. Allow sexual tension to build over time and experiment like never before.

Spend time together
If you’re in a rut, it’s imperative to incorporate more meaningful time and affectionate actions into your day-to-day life. This will allow your partner to feel loved, protected, and comfortable with you. Open up to each other instead of holding your feelings inside. Find the other person’s love language and act on what’s going to make them happy. To rebuild the romance step by step, it can be as simple as hand holding or occasional public displays of affection.

Practice Spontaneity
We all know that repetition can be boring. When couples who know everything about each other’s days drone on more or less the same, there’s nothing to look forward to. Participate in activities that your partner wouldn’t normally expect but appreciate, just for the sake of making them happy. Come home with a bouquet of their favorite flowers. Decorate the living room with scattered rose petals. Make a list of your favorite things about your partner that made you fall for them. Get creative!
If you still feel like there are fractures in your marriage or that you and your spouse are lacking intimacy, it may be time to seek professional help in couples therapy.

Are you ready to take the next step in your love life? Contact Susan Block, LMFT, and her team for your complimentary consultation. Our telehealth counseling services are 100% remote and available to couples across Florida and beyond. Give yourself the gift of therapy and spend some time exploring your mental health. Call today!