A Commitment to Making Your Relationship Better

As a new year begins, many people find it a great time to re-evaluate their personal or professional goals and way of living.  Often you will hear people say they want to keep an exercise routine, eat healthier, be more patient, work towards a promotion, apologize to enemies, or pay off debt… But don’t forget to make your relationship a priority in your resolutions as well!

Individual growth is great; in fact, it’s important to find yourself before you find love with another.  But along with your individual goals and resolutions, the New Year is a great reminder to explore how your can improve your relationship too… and maybe you can even do some of your personal goals TOGETHER.  Whether you and your boyfriend/ girlfriend/ husband/ wife are having difficulties or are feeling pretty solid, building your relationship together should always be a significant factor in your life.  So here are some ideas to help keep your love going strong in your romantic relationship.

5 New Year’s Resolutions for Couples:

  1. Spend QUALITY Time Alone Together – Sometimes it feels like there are just not enough hours in the day, but setting aside some time every day or every week to spend a little time together can go a long way. This can be as simple as starting a routine to take the dog out for a morning walk together instead of taking turns, where you can relax and talk to each other for 10 minutes at the start of your day. Or you could wake up 5 minutes early to snuggle before jumping out of bed, share a shower together, or schedule a baby sitter every Friday night for date night. Whether you want this to be romantic or conversational, try to set aside this time that is separate from spending time together while you are juggling cooking dinner, and answering text messages and work emails while half listening to your significant other’s day.
  2. Accept Differences – You don’t always have to agree on everything. The next time you find you are bickering or arguing over a difference of opinion, stop and listen to what the other has to say and try to respect their opinion even when it differs from your own. Try NOT to just respond with anger, sarcasm, or defensiveness. Agree to disagree and be happy you each have your own passions about things.
  3. Volunteer Together – Giving back to the community or those in need is a rewarding experience. If you can both set aside time to volunteer at a local shelter or community once a month, you’ll not only be helping out, but will feel great to be able to give back. And an added bonus is this becomes a perfect chance to do something together and see your partner in good light.
  4. Goals for improving your relationship in the new year - New Year's Resolutions for CouplesCompliment Each Other – Give each other the compliments you might be thinking but don’t usually say. When your spouse gets dressed up for a nice dinner or looks awesome to you in sweats, tell them how beautiful or handsome you think they are. When they helped with cooking, picking up the kids, listened to you vent about work, or handled the problem with your annoying neighbor with class… tell your partner how much you appreciate him or her. Send a text in the middle of the day with a compliment to let them know you are thinking about them.
  5. Make a Resolution Pact – Instead of resenting your spouse because they still smoke, leave a mess in the bathroom, or watch too much TV, secretly (or maybe not-so-secretly) wishing they will change, ask your partner what bad habit you can break or good habit you can start along with them. Keep it fair and fun… not forcing the other person to change who they are, but rather something they also want to improve about themselves. Maybe you agree to help the kids with homework every night if he or she will limit weekly spending on work lunches. This can be a good way to challenge and encourage each other to reach goals you each want.


For added help keeping your relationship resolutions or for building your relationship’s foundation such as improving communication, Couples Counseling can help guide you in the right direction… and it can actually be a wonderful way to keep a routine for you and your partner to keep your relationship growing.  For more information on Couples Counseling in Coral Springs and surrounding South Florida areas, contact Susan Block, LMFT.