How to handle emotional symptoms of relationship issues
Relationships are complicated. And while it seems like everyone acknowledges this, things get trickier when the relationship is your own. Even when you know that you and your partner are committed to each other, any relationship issues you might encounter can still lead to feelings of depression and anxiety. The worst thing about those feelings are that it often seems like there’s nowhere you can turn for help, especially not your partner, when it feels like they’re cause of the anxiety or depression in the first place. However, that’s exactly what you need to do. Here are some tips for what you can do to help take the anxious or depressive feelings out of your relationship.
What you can do
The necessary first step is pinning down what issue in your relationship is causing these feelings. It might not even be just one issue but several, including stress, uncertainty, and loss of trust. Once you’ve narrowed things down, come up with a plan that incorporates practical ways to deal with these issues. If you or your partner are struggling with stress to the point where it is negatively affecting the relationship, make it a point to take time out and have an honest conversation about both your needs and what you each can do to help alleviate the other’s stress. It may sound simple, but physical affection like touching and holding, even when you’re mad at the other person, has a calming effect and can help relax you and your partner, reminding each other that you’re not going anywhere. This alone can go a long way towards taking some of the anxiety out of your relationship, even when you fight. If you’re depression about your relationship stems from a loss of trust, you and your partner need to focus on rebuilding that trust from the ground up. This can mean starting over completely and wiping the slate clean, which is never as easy as it sounds. If you and your partner can stick with this plan and not fall into old habits that caused the break in trust in the first place, you’ll both find yourselves feeling a lot less depressed in your relationship. Finally, some relationship anxiety is caused not by a tangible issue but your own uncertainty. If reassurances from your partner don’t help, oftentimes you just need to stay mentally busy. Instead of imagining hypothetical fights with your partner, do activities together, go on dates, watch movies, develop your own hobbies. All of these things can help keep your mind from wandering into anxious or negative emotions.
Relationships are complicated, but more importantly, the only person you can change in them is yourself. You can work with your partner and be as open as possible as you try to overcome the issues that are causing the anxiety and depression in your relationship. If you and your partner continue to struggle with these anxious and depressive feelings, reach out to Susan Block, a Coral Springs counselor who is experienced in depression, anxiety, grief counseling, couples counseling and more. Call 954-675-1936 today to schedule a consultation.